Memory
by SugarCoatedInsanity
Summary: When Edward leaves Bella in New Moon instead of going into hiding he visits a friend from his rebellious years. He asks her for a favor, and she owes him. full summary inside
1. Prologue

**Full summary**: When Edward leaves Bella in New Moon instead of going into hiding he goes and visits a friend from his rebellious years. Leara is one of the few people outside of his family/coven that he still trusts. He asks her for a favor, and she owes him. He wants to have the memory of him and Bella together erased from the people of Forks. Edward came to her desperate, and she has no choice but to go along w/ it. But where does that leave Bella in the end?

**A/N:** Heehee. This is my 1st shot at fanfiction and I'm not sure if I should continue this. I only have the prologue written so far. So review and tell me if u think it good enough for me to continue. Hope you enjoy and thanks for reading. :)!!

Dedicated to my friend Emily.

**Disclaimer:** I'm not Stephenie Meyer

**Songs to listen to while reading**: The Academy Is…: Everything We Had; Blink- 182: I Miss you; Coldplay: Trouble

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Prologue.

It was raining again. You would think that it would be a little less… wet outside of Forks. Everything reminds me of her. It's unbearably strange how someone so small, so insignificant compared to the rest of the world could have such an impact on me. If I was human or if I had never been changed maybe she would have a chance. Letting myself get so close to her might have been the biggest mistake I ever made. But leaving her is the hardest thing I'll ever have to do.

I keep telling myself that this is for her good. This is the only way that she can be safe: without me to complicate things. I can bet that she was fending for herself just fine before I came along. Then again, this is Bella. I couldn't help but chuckle at that fact. She was taking care of Renee before she even knew who I was. She grew up so fast, when I met her she was no longer a child. But at the same time held the innocence of a little girl of two.

She's my Bella. It will always be Bella. She's my only one, the only one that I've ever wanted. The only thing in the world that I can't have.

I was on my way to see Leara, an old friend. I hadn't seen her in years but she was the only one who could help me in this situation. I doubt she would say no.

I'm running through the woods trying to see if I can catch her scent. I don't mind the cold or getting wet, I just want to find her before I go insane.

It's been a few minutes and I can see the sun beginning to set through the trees and I can smell oleander and peony amidst the dirt and bark of the wildwood. It's her.

I can hear Leara's thoughts humming in the silence. _Who's there? Edward? What's he doing here?_ Her thoughts are getting closer and I know what's coming next. I speed up trying to avoid the inevitable. I see a flash of red and I know that I'm gone. Next thing I know I'm being tackled into the ground by a very hyperactive vampire.

"Edward!" she yells. We're tumbling through the dirt and smashing down several trees. She waits until we stop before speaking again. "It's been so long, too long. I've missed you." I was sitting now and she had her arms around my neck in an embrace that could kill even the strongest human. "You never visit, and I hate you for that. But I'm ecstatic that you finally came."

"It's a good thing that I didn't come back." She, like Alice could always make me smile; but it was never long lived. My mind was preoccupied so I couldn't really enjoy the reunion.

"Don't talk like that."

"I'm wet and muddy, can we just go?" I helped her up and we made our way to her home, walking slowly through the trees.

"So I presume Carlisle is doing just fine."

"Yeah, he has a wife now. And we have a few more family members."

"That is really nice. I'm glad he's okay… Why are you here, Edward? You don't seem at all happy to see me."

"I'll explain when we get to your house." It's not that far from where we landed but each passing minute seems like an eternity in itself.

"Is something wrong, you seem preoccupied…distant. You know that you can talk to me about anything." I don't answer, we stop. "We're here." She opens the door and walks inside. I follow her in. It had been more than fifty years since I've been here. It's so different but the comfort being here brought me was essentially the same.

She leaves me in the living room and comes back changed. "Edward, make yourself at home."

"What about the mud?" I joke.

"Sit… So you were saying?"

"In all seriousness, I need you to do me a favor."

"It all depends on what it is."

"Leara, you owe me."

"I know I do… but that still doesn't change the fact that it depends on what it is. I love you but I'm not putting myself in danger unless I'm given a really good reason."

I sighed; thoroughly unsure of what to say for the moment. I gave her a pleading look and she took the cue.

"We've only just been reunited. There's no need to rush into things….Do you want to talk about it?"

"I'm sorry, but no. It's hard enough as it is. I just want to forget."

"I understand, but you still have yet to tell me what you want me to do."

"I want you to erase the memories of a town."

"A town, Edward? Are you crazy?"

I chuckled to that. "I think I just might be… It's a small town and it's not much of a memory, just that of me… and a girl."

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	2. Chapter 1

**A/N**: I've decided to continue this. Thanks to those of you who reviewed or even bothered to read. This chapter takes place in Bella's perspective. Hope you enjoy and thanks for reading :)!!

**Songs to listen to while reading:** Norah Jones: Seven Years; Men, Women, & Children: Dance In My Blood; Finch: Bitemarks and Bloodstains; Editors: An End Has a Start

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Chapter 1.

3 years later…

It was raining again but that came as no shocker. I am living in Washington after all. I look out the window and just sorta stare at the life outside. I'm sitting on the window seat as if hoping, waiting, wishing, that someone would take me away from this life and give it some sort of meaning. I was by no means unhappy. It's just that life had become so dull. I was thankful for what I had; the life that I lived. But for a while now there's been this feeling that I'm missing something. I don't know what it is, but I know that I had it once and now it's gone.

I wasn't always this way. Believe me I'm not always this sad. I have a boyfriend, my friends are amazing, and I'm a junior at UW. It's just that every year around my birthday I get this feeling, and it takes a while to go away and for things to get back to normal.

"Bella, are you ready?" My roommate Emily pops into my room fully dressed for a night on the town.

"Yeah," I reply, getting up and walking over to where she stood. She wolf whistles at my outfit and motions for me to give a little spin and strike a pose. I humor her then grab my purse. Seconds later we're out the door, laughing all the way.

It's about an hour and a half drive to the club she decided to take me to. It's getting dark and we're not even halfway there. The music playing is depressing me. Watching the trees whoosh by is lulling me to sleep. I don't feel like falling asleep so I change the radio station.

Emily looks at me for a minute then turns back to the road. "You love that station."

"I know… I'm just not in the mood for it today."

"Is there something wrong then? Anything you'd like to talk about?" I don't like the serious tone she's taken. She's always been so insightful, understanding. But this was something that I didn't exactly know how to discuss.

"To be honest I have no idea. I'm not really sure what's wrong."

Emily smiles a small smile at me, "Tell me when you're ready." She moves her right hand from the steering wheel to put it on my left; giving it a little squeeze before turning back to the road. A comfortable silence falls between us. The only thing in its way is the music coming from the speakers.

"But seriously…" she starts again.

"What?"

"You need to lighten up. Buck up ol' cheerio! You're twenty one now. This is a joyous occasion. We're going to a party not a funeral, and besides the best friend is always the one blamed. People are going to think I'm holding your books hostage, or that I've burned them all." She looks at me with a smirk on her face. I look at her and from the look on her face bust out in laughter. I laugh and she does too. "Atta girl, that's the Bella I like to see." And I can't help but feel better, even if it's just a little.

I look back to the windshield and my eyes widen in fear. "Emily!" I yell. But there's no time to react, I know we're gone. Headlights are speeding towards us and as she tries to swerve the car crashes into us, sending us into the trees. The impact is huge. The seatbelt is crushing me, the airbag is suffocating me, and my life is flashing before my eyes. I'm seeing Charlie, Renee, and a man. A beautiful man, but the darkness takes me before I can dwell on his face.

…

…

…

As if in a dream I open my eyes and try to breathe. It hurts and I can smell blood. Lots of it. I roll my head to the side only to see Emily's car. There's blood coming from it and I'm wondering why I'm not inside. I'm numb, I can't feel a thing. I know I'm in excruciating pain but it's like the pain receptors in my brain have shut down. I'm lying on my back but have no idea how I got on the ground. I'm lying in pool of warm sticky liquid and I'm afraid to think of what it is, or what it could be.

A figure comes from the car and I know that I have to be dead. Never in my life had I seen someone so beautiful, she has to be an angel. The red dress she's wearing billows around her in what I can only imagine is a slight breeze.

As she walks closer I can see the blood on her face, see the red of her eyes, and I know that she's no angel. She's the devil, come to take me to hell. Fear overpowers me and I can't move. I didn't do anything wrong, I lived a good life. I wasn't a strong believer but I never did anything to get me into hell.

It's getting harder and harder to breathe. I'm hyperventilating now if I wasn't before and she smiles at the fact. She stops inches away from me, she's more beautiful than I thought. She loses her smirk and looks at me inquisitively, dropping to her knees. She sits me up and cradles me to her. I have neither the power nor energy to fight her.

"My, aren't you a pretty little thing?" she speaks, whispering. She's lowering her head to my neck and I'm losing it. I feel her lips reach my skin then something pierces through. I can feel this and it's the worst pain I've ever known. I scream and she does nothing to stop. Spots of light are dancing in my eyes before I'm enveloped into darkness, hoping that this really means death and I'm not brought back.

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	3. Chapter 2

**A/N:** I greatly apologize for the extremely long wait. I completely forgot about this until like two days ago. Ha, shows you how good I am with updates. I really like this idea so I'm going to try and continue this for reals. lol. I'm not very good with updates and it takes me a long time to write with school everything. So if I'm focused then I'll be able to write a chapter maybe every two weeks?... But I'm not promising anything. The months (i think its almost been a year) its taken me to remember this prove it. And it only took me two days to write this because I had part of it already written. In conclusion: I fail at life. lol

Sorry for the extremely long A/N. Edward's perspective. Happy Reading!

(lessthanthree) Maggie

**Songs to listen to while reading:** Coldplay: In My Place; Green Day: Waiting; Yeah Yeah Yeahs: Maps; Sugarcult: Memory; Bloc Party: I Still Remember

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Chapter 2.

I can hear my family: their thoughts, their laughter. From my room I'm barraged with the sounds of their happiness. I wish I could join them. I truly wish I could, but I can't, not right now.

My life has lost all meaning. But this… is for her. I'd suffer an eternity if she has a chance at a normal life. Not the one of danger she had with me. Everything about our existence was a threat to her.

_This is for the best._

Is what I keep telling myself. But _I_ don't believe my words.

_This is for the best._

Is what I've been telling my family for as long as they've been watching me deteriorate. I've heard their thoughts. I know they don't believe me. They see what this is doing to me and think me a fool for being so selfless. _Selfless_?! I revile the word. Having her for as long as I did was the most selfish thing I could ever do. I never should have fallen, I never should have indulged.

They think I'm worse than before I found her, but I refuse to believe them. At least now I'd known what it was to love. Nothing could be worse than not knowing. How stupid I was thinking that I had everything. When in reality I had nothing at all.

I wish I could block it all out.

With time they've learned to be careful around me. Even hearing her name hurt. I tried not to think of the word, the beautiful moniker that fit her so.

I wish I could just leave, I wish I could just… die. Oh, how wonderful death would be. Hell would be my reward. I think this with peace, knowing that my misdeeds could not have gone uncounted, undocumented but whatever higher entity actually existed. Hell would be better than this. At least then I'd be dead. Not this half-life… this fake death: needing to feed on the life of others to survive.

_Edward. _

"Alice, what do you want?" I murmur. I would usually be downstairs with the rest of them but today I couldn't bear it. She was born twenty one years ago today. And it was this day 3 years ago that I knew, without a doubt that this life wasn't good enough for her. She deserves so much more.

My family knew. They'd been considerate enough to leave me to my own devices all week. I appreciated that they -especially Alice and Esme- didn't attempt to pull me from my depression with the asinine activities I'd once enjoyed.

I have to admit that sometimes they helped. They helped get my mind off of her, even if for a few moments. But as soon as I was alone, the angel of my dreams haunted me once again. I couldn't go back to her if I wanted, she wouldn't remember me. But this is for the best.

I regret not asking Leara to erase my memories along with those of Forks. But this is how it should be. _This_ is how I would repent for my sins, living immortally in my own personal hell.

_I've had a vision…of her. _Alice's voice was trembled, she sounded like she was about to cry. There was something terrifically wrong.

I sat up from my where I was lying on the window seat. "What do you mean? What's wrong?" As far as I knew, Alice had stopped having visions about her altogether, or has at least been blocking them from me.

I rushed down the stairs only to see the majority of the family trying to console a visibly shaken Alice. She was curled up in Jasper's lap, while he whispered to her, frantically and feverishly, trying with all he could to calm the situation.

"What happened?" I let out before I could even think to decipher the jumble of thoughts going through Alice's head. My voice was hoarse, I feared the worst.

"She-she was in an accident. S-someone found her… one-one of us."

"What?" I stood there frozen. "What happened?"

"Drunk driver. It was dark. Her friend was driving and she died instantly." There was a pause before she gasped. It was a rasping, heart wrenching sound that seemed as if it would break someone as small and fragile as she looked at the moment. "I can't see her anymore!" she yelled near hysterics. "I'm trying-I'm trying so hard. After she found her, I can't see her any more." Her sobs pierced the silence of the room. Everyone wore grave expressions. This was unmistakably a difficult ordeal for us all

"Do you know who found her? It wasn't Victoria was it?" My hands clenched to fists at the thought, if Victoria found her… My beautiful Be--, my angel.

"Thankfully it wasn't Victoria," Jasper whispered.

"Do you know where? I--" I already had a foot out the door when Esme cut me off.

"Edward!" She was suddenly in front of me, hugging me. I looked down at her, it still astonished me how nurturing she could be. But a hug wasn't what I needed at the moment, I had to get out of here.

"I have to find her."

"Edward," she spoke in a small voice. "Please calm down."

"I have to do something!" I stepped back leaving her embrace. "I can't just leave her there with god knows who."

"You don't have to go yet," she let out quickly. "Carlisle is on his way. We'll think of something."

"Esme…"

"Edward…" Her voice reached a deadly calm. I'd only heard it on the few occasions where she'd demanded authority. "Alice cares about Bella as much as you do. We all do." I cringed at her name, hearing it said out loud was like a physical blow. "She was a part of this family once and is still a daughter to me. Any decisions to be made can wait for Carlisle, he's right outside." At the close of her words he walked into the room.

"What happened?" he asked looking around the room. What he saw worried him, he put a hand on my shoulder as if to stop the confrontation that could have been between Esme and me. He then saw Alice's condition and the severe looks on the faces of everyone else. Jasper filled him in on the situation, answering any questions he may have had before he even asked them. Waiting for the seconds to tick by was agonizing.

"Where was she last?" This question particularly caught my interest, even though I already knew the answer. I'd read what I could of Alice's thoughts. I was still focusing on them. She was replaying the images, as if a movie. All the events that lead to what we were dealing with now.

_Bella looking despondently out a window.  
__Bella's friend making her spin around, their laughter following.  
__Bella changing the radio station.  
__Bella words to her friend in the car.  
__Bella yelling her friend's name.  
__The impact.  
__The vampire._

It ended and replayed over and over in her thoughts. The images of her lying in her own blood, in _pain_, were almost too much to bear. I wanted to be away from here, with her, once again. To take her pain away.

There was a small side of me that was saying that it was too late. _No_! I refused to believe that, I _wouldn't_ let myself think that. There had to be hope.

_Edward we're leaving. _Carlisle's thoughts called to me.I grabbed the keys he threw in my general direction and was in the garageas fast as my legs carried me. I was in front of the house just as Carlisle was stepping outside followed by Jasper carrying a still crying Alice.

We were all in the car and on our way within a couple of seconds.

"I'm not sure…" Carlisle and I looked back at Alice, whose sobs had finally stopped. "I'm not sure but I don't think it's happened yet. It's going to happen. I know that for sure, it keeps playing over and over again. But we might not be too late." I was torn. There was still a chance. But if we were too late, I'm not sure how I'd be able to live with myself.

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Ok some notes

1) I had a friend read this and she was complaining to me that they should be trying to help Bella instead of just standing there talking. I thought it was implied when I was writing this but i guess not, so i thought I'd clarify :). They're vampires therefore super fast. So this whole scene takes place under like 2 minutes. I guess it seemed more than that.

2)Edward does think alot. So sorry if it gets a bit repetitve at times. Give the guy a break he's depressed lol. Who loves sexy emo Edward? I do :D heheh.. I'm a nerd. lol

3)When Edward asked Leara to erase the memories of Forks he didn't ask for his memories of Bella or that of his family to be erased.

4)They still live in Forks.

Umm.. i think that's it. R&R


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